I’m writing by the light of a lone, dying candle. I know not when it will flicker out, but I fear that may happen soon. The dark is less comfortable when the means to escape it is gone.

The damage outside was immense. Trees blocked every second street, lines were down as often, and damage to homes and property was quite common. Much of the carnage has so far gone unrepaired.

Nathan and I walked around for a few blocks when he woke up and saw much of the local harm. Most seemed superficial, but some homes were hit by trees, and many sidewalks had been torn up with tree roots. It was a uniquely awe-inducing sight.

We later returned to the apartment and talked with Greg some. After still more time we walked to a corner store for supplies. On the way home we snapped some photos of the more impressive hurricane evidence.

We then walked to King’s University, where we found Ilea sleeping in her lightless dorm room. She filled us in on some details about the storm. Included in this was the fact that a state of emergency had been declared, that her residence had flooded some, and that a ship had sunk in the harbour.

We headed downtown to survey more damage, and found that some stores had power and were open. We stocked up on some more things and then went to the water front. There we saw the sunken ship, or rather the top of its masts as they broke the water’s surface.

In our search to find some hot food we were called to from a passing car. It turned out to be my cousin’s husband, Frank. He was in the city for a military training course and was looking for food himself. We all hopped into his car and eventually made our way to a pub called Maxwell’s Plum. There Frank bought us all dinner and we talked in the crowded eating area. Nathan was forced to sit in a child’s high chair.

When we finished there Frank drove us all back here, where we finished out the night playing card games in the light of flickering flames.

The night the hurrican began Nathan and I were watching its lightning, rain and winds assault our neighbourhood from the safety of our living room. The power blinked on and off several times before giving out for good.

Once this occurred we looked out back to see two cars beneath a falled tree. While they apparantly were not seriously damaged, it did show us how easily a tree could fall on us.

Somehow, despite all that, we donned our boots and jackets to confront wild nature. We stepped out the back door and were soaked with rain after wading to the road. We walked around the block, tredding rivers, avoiding downed trees and lines, and fighting the wind and rain, which removed most visability. We made it back here well drenched.

It’s eight-thirty in the morning, and hurricane Juan is still bombarding our cave with wind and rain. Nature’s dance has become frantic, with the trees bending as they meet the wind and his hammer.

There’s a steady beep coming from the alarm system that is punching through my thoughts now. It’s an unpleasant and arificial sound in direct conflict with the beauty of the storm’s wind, rain and calm-induced song. The tapping drum on the window and the roaring leaves comfort, but the man-made alert frustrates and pushes back peace.

Rain is falling hard, as it was last night, forming rivers over the sidewalk and road. The front lawn is covered with the bodies of defeated leaves, cut down before they could even begin on the path to brilliant yellows, oranges and reds. The air is winning against the earth in this battle.

From this living room window I see a family passing, a father and his children, a daughter and a son, braving the weather to the sound of sudden sirens and traffic.

Down the street dark earth is visable where a great maple was up-rooted. It leans toward a house with gentle forebodance. All along the road lie the limbs of its cousins.

I opened the window some to let in more of the sounds. A larger number of cars seems to be in motion now, and voices are reaching through the gusts and down pour. Rowdy teenagers are passing and acting brave before running from the rain.

A flash of lightning and thunder have brought back their further warning, while city repair crews have just arrived. A woman with a red and white umbrella watches them intently. Now beyond my view, only waves of sound bear witness to the engines’ work. Orange light is sweeping across houses on the other side of the street.

My roommates Greg and Nathan are sleeping, unaware of all this motion, perhaps dreaming of the eye. This storm’s eye seemed to be here a couple hours ago, when the air was calm and free of droplets.

“Having fun so far?” drifts up to me, breaking away from two men’s conversation obscenely. In such weather perhaps such jovial remarks are a needed distraction from the damage.

More people are walking the sidewalks dressed in their rain coats and soaked to the bone. Children too young to remember another hurricane are speaking with wonder in their voices. Seniours are weathering this storm like they have countless others.

All this is happening throughout the city and province, while I’m sitting safely here in this chair by the window, with my pen in hand and my phone ready beside me. Such calm seems so strange amid the lashing or limbs and cry of the wind merely beyond the glass.

Voice Entry

( MP3 )

Click the link above to hear my voice entry.

This afternoon I went in search of concert tickets and a present for my mother’s birthday. I found both, with the latter taking considerable deliberation. I finally decided on The Illuminated Life of Maud Lewis, a book about the life of a local folk artist whose work my mother enjoys.

I returned home and talked with Ashley for a while before leaving for downtown. I met April at Scotia Square and then we walked around talking for a while before taking a seat by the clock tower, where we spent some time observing the city and talking more about such things as “holy magical maple”.

We made it to the Marquee half way through The Mudmen’s set and waded in to the center of the floor. The band was alright, but they haven’t impressed me any of the times I have seen them live.

We made in up to a few people back from the stage between acts, and managed to stay there when Bif Naked came onto the stage despite a rather unfortunate drunk who fell onto April. Bif put on a great show, playing mostly songs I knew and working the crowd well. “Spaceman” was the definite highlight for me. I could not have admitted to be a huge fan of Bif before this concert, but I definitely have a new appreciation for her now.

Brittin Black, the guitarist for Live on Release, and also Bif’s touring guitarist, tapped me on the shoulder and passed in front of April and I while we were waiting for Bif to play. I suppose that’s my brush with fame for the night. I found it amusing, at least.

After the show I waited with April in the drizzle until her parents picked her up. Then I was walking and wandering my way back here.

Sleep

I’m taking the time to ponder spam that tries to convince me I want to look 20 years younger. 9 months is not the age I consider to be my peak.

I have been trying to practive playing my guitar more often in the past few days, following some lessons that Nathan has been suggesting. Progress is quite slow, but I’m determined to learn to play this instrument, so I’ll stick with it as long as it takes. I feel very at peace with the guitar in my hands, despite my lack of ability.

Tomorrow night I might be going to see Bif Naked at The Marquee Club with my friend April. It should be a great time if we can get tickets. I’m not a huge fan of Bif, but I’m sure she’d be great to see live.

Saturday is going to be the first Smash Hash Weekend, a planned get together of some of my friends here at the cave for some gaming, hanging out and general good times. I’m hoping it can all come together, but confirmations are still up in the air. My fingers are crossed.

This morning I watched Enlightenment Guaranteed, a wonderful German (subtitled) film that dealt with two troubled middle-aged brothers who travelled to Japan to stay at a monastery and their search for meaning in their lives. Their interaction was humourous and very well protrayed. There were subtle things about their behaviour that I thought showed great acting prowess by the two leads. With my recent understanding of Taoism I was able to recognize the Zen teachings’ roots in Taoism, though their rituals seemed to be a bit overdone in relation to my understanding of Tao. It’s a great film, so check it out!

I have at last finished reading The Tao of Inner Peace by Diane Dreher. It was really a very enlightening book, one I fully intend to review in the future, and practice its lessons in my daily life. It has had some very important impacts on my life that I’m very thankful for. I certainly would encourage you all to pick it up if you can.

Here are some highlights from the final chapters:

“Taoist Problem Solving” – working with cycles, wisdom of prevention, solving problems with cycles, turning problems into resources, priciple of return, cycles and solutions, thinking globally and acting locally

“The Importance of Timing” – seasons of our lives, accepting our changes (adulthood and spiritual maturity), beginning a new cycle, respecting cycles, beginnings and endings, the wisdom of beginning, widsom of endingds, timing means prevention

“Transcending Hostile Cycles” – recognizing energy drains, the path to transcendence, centering, nonresistance, taking positive action, yin and yang positive acts, responding with clear vision, transcending hostile cycle for yourself, transcending hostile cycles and reaching out to others, transcending hostile cycles in society

“Leading With The Tao” – transcending old stereotypes, leading through cooperation, observing the cycles (watching and listening), leading with courage, leader as facilitator

“Keeping The One” – recognizing the one, practical mysticism, affirming oneness in our world, living the one

“The Way of Love” – the unifying power of love, love is an active process, the way beyond ego, the way of self-acceptance, transcending judgement, transcending anger, living in the present, the way of loving service

“Harmonious Action: Wu Wei” – harmonious action, nonviolent attitude, the power of trust, attention to process

“Resolving conflict” – avoiding dualism, how to stop making enemies, achieving clarity, the politics of nonviolence, bearing witness for truth, nonviolent action, promoting clarity, affirming compassion, affirming oneness

“Building Cooperation” – common goals, Taoist communication, listening to others, communicating honestly, building consensus, cooperating with nature, building cooperative politics

“The Tao of Community” – recognizing our interdependence, building your local community, discovering new kinds of communities, supporting your natural community, reaching out to the larger community, reaching out to support your global community

“Creating Taoist Politics” – claiming our personal power, leading from grassroots, practicing holistic politics, living the process

These chapters have helped to affirm my political views, focus on some problem areas of my life, and to encourage me to take direct action in my life. It has definitely been a rewarding and strengthing part of my life while reading this book, and I will make true efforts to continue my growth.

Affirmation:

I now know my life is peaceful and harmonious.

I recognize the natural cycles and work with them.

I recognize the energy cycles in my world.

I feel my oneness with all life on this planet.

I see myself as part of a living community.

I affirm this oneness daily through cooperation, compassion, and service.

I think globally, act locally, reaching out to my community, near and far.

I communicate clearly, listen carefully, and respect the views of others.

I cooperate more each day, living the wisdom of Tao.

Centered and powerful, I live my beliefs.

I lead from the grassroots, working for the good of all.

I think holistically, act cooperatively, practice Taoist politics.

I always remember that life is a process.

I affirm the wisdom of wu wei.

I practice harmonious action, nonviolent attitude and attention to process.

I am careful with my timing.

I resolve conflict with compassion.

I center myself.

I seek clarity.

I affirm oneness and work with the larger patterns.

I act nonviolently, treating everyone with love and respect.

I keep the one in my life.

I am one with all the life on this planet.

I avoid fragmentation and affirm oneness through positive action.

I lead with Tao.

I live with compassion.

I love and nurture myself.

I do not criticize myself or others.

I channel my anger into constructive outlets.

I live in the present, releasing the past.

I reach out in loving service.

I listen carefully, aware of the cycles within and around me.

I cooperate with them.

I act with courage and confidence.

I work with my team for the good of the whole.

I practice the wisdom of prevention.

I affirm the order of Tao in my life.

I overcome the hostile cycles within and around me.

When faced with problems, I look to the larger cycles and cooperate with Tao.

I think globally, act locally.

I center myself, release negativity, and take positive action.

I respect myself and the process.

I harmonize with nature and all others in my world.

I accept greater peace in my life now.

And so it is.

“It’s the job that’s never started as takes longest to finish.”
–J.R.R. Tolkien

Tonight I read the entire story of The Makeshift Miracle. I found it to be a wonderful story with some well done writing that kept me guessing throughout the duration of the story. I sincerely recomend that you all give it a read. If you like it then you need only pay $0.99 to read it all.

The Makeshift Miracle is a web comic chronicling the surreal coming-of-age adventures of Colby Reynolds, a teenager disillusioned with life and his future.

[ Music: The Creatures - Slipping Away [Tick Tock Mix] ]

I spent another Monday hanging out with Wanda. I had a great time wandering around the malls, looking for music and the other fun we enjoyed.

I arrived early at the mall to meet Wanda so I decided I needed some ice cream. It was a choice I certainly didn’t forget the peach and raspberry ice cream in a waffle cone was some of the best stuff I’ve tasted in months.

At 2 I walked to the Tim Horton’s and met Wanda as she was coming in the door. We walked around a bit and then caught the bus for downtown.

At Random Play I sold some CD’s and got a couple new ones. I picked up The Marvelous 3′s Hey! Album (which I previously had only on cassette) and Eyes For Telescopes’s Please Survive, an 8-track CD. Please Survive is certainly not as good as the later album, but it’s still solid and has some good songs. Getting both albums I did today without having to spend any actual cash was nice.

After finishing at the music store (which took a while, as there’s just so much good stuff there) we wandered around, went to other stores, ate and eventually came back here for a little while. Then it was off to H.S.C. to look around some more before Wanda had to catch her bus.

It was once again good times.

Oh yes, sometime in there Wanda discovered the divinity of ducks, multiple bikes were dodged, and we found some beautiful, but expensive, wigs.

[ Music: Live - River Town ]

Tonight was quite incredible! It was certainly one of the best concerts I have been to, though perhaps not in the same league as Buck 65.

Around 9:30 I met Sascha and Shane at The Marquee Club and then we proceeded to enter and find a table to sit at. We talked about the usual things and burned the time up until Eyes For Telescopes took the stage, when we went up front.

Their set was great, though the vocals could have been mixed a bit higher. It was hard to make out a lot of them, but the overall sound was really good. They played some songs I recognized from their album, and some I hadn’t heard, but it was all wonderful to hear in a live setting. During their set there was crazy dancing and one guy, a friend of the band, even took is outrageous moves to the stage. Eyes For Telescopes is a really solid group with multiple vocalists and a unique sound. Live they were definitely a lot more in the rock vein than I expected, but pleasantly so.

While waiting for The Trews to come on, some people I know from high school showed up and stood beside us. Amanda and I meet up at the weirdest places, so we had a discussion about stalking occuring.

The Trews were simply amazing. Their set was long, and filled with some of the best live music anywhere. They were dead on with every song (most of which I knew quite well from the album, single and their website), and their guitarist, John Angus, was incredible throughout the set, showing that he is a true virtuoso. As a closer they covered Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love” and “Rock & Roll” expertly. It was just one of those shows that makes you say “wow!”

If any of you have the chance then you’d better grant yourself the honor of hearing this band. They are destined for greatness.

After the show Sascha and Shane gave me a drive home, and I came up here with ringing ears and memories of a great night.

Last night I watched David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive and I was really impressed by it. It’s a film that deftly mixes horror, mystery, romance, humour and suspense in a greatly symbolic mess that explores the dangers of both reality and the Hollywood dream. Once I figured out the meaning of much of it, I was able to appreciate the great work that it is. I will definitely be rewatching it in the coming days, and I will be seeking out other works by Mr. Lynch.

As an end note, here’s a quote from The Trews’ website about one of the standout songs they played tonight:
Hollis and Morris
Homage to our home away from home in Halifax Nova Scotia. A street corner that’s seen many a late night after playing empty bars all over the city as One I’d Trouser. The apartment belonged to Jack’s dad Victor Syperek, Buck 65 currently inhabits it, and it’s on a corner where dirty old men pick up hookers. Just for the record, none of The Trews have been with prostitutes.

I got out of the cave today. I’ve been holing up here too many hours of the day and becoming stagnant. I need to freshen up the environment more in the coming days.

This evening I decided I needed to go for a long walk to escape. I needed the fresh air, but I also needed to explore this city. While I’ve lived here for two years, I still do not know this city as well as I should. The beautiful and facinating parts have largely remained hidden to me. I went through streets I have never seen before, through the poorer, crumbling sections of the city where I felt remarkably at ease and safe. There’s a beauty in the decay that most people don’t seem to notice. Yes, it would be better for these people to live more comfortably, but their resiliance is admirable and gives a greater dynamic to the city.

I’m discovering the soul of Halifax slowly, and learning to love it. It’s a old one, but one of beauty, strength and evolution, wrapped in pieces of history. She’s held a lot of roles, and had her share of bad lovers, but she’ll greet you with a smile, tell you some stories over coffee and take a walk with you at any hour. If you look past the dust and scars you’ll see her wise beauty, and maybe she’ll share some you can keep.

On the way home from my walking I stopped off at Park Lane to take a look around. At Frog Hollow Books I looked around for a while and finally decided to buy Ross A. Laird‘s A Stone’s Throw, a book about stories and myth. This promises to be a very interesting read, and definitely a worthy whim buy.

Later on during my return journey I stopped by Video Difference to get a couple 7 day rentals. Mulholland Drive, directed by David Lynch and Enlightenment Guaranteed were my selections this evening. I’ll of course tell you what I think of them when I find the time to view them. The Mulholland Drive was picked up mostly because of the House of Leaves connection in the name (Mulholland Drive was where a very memorable piece of the book took place).

Tonight I finished reading the newly published ElfQuest manga-style volume. It’s a reprinting of older stories to be told in a chronological form and in black and white. This first issue had stories I had not yet read, and I enjoyed them very much. They added much to my understanding of the whole series. I’m definitely considering collecting the entire DC run of ElfQuest, as the manga-style of packing more stories into a single issue really appeals to me, as does the novel-like size and shape.

Tomorrow night I will hopefully be seeing The Trews and Eyes For Telescopes. I’m looking forward to seeing two of my favourite bands, and especially E.F.T. for the first time. I wonder if Sascha is still planning to go. I would definitely like to see him again, and a concert is one of the better places.

On Monday my friend Wanda is planning to come into the city again. I had a great time this week hanging out with her and I’m sure Monday will be just as fun. She asked me to take some photos of her, so I suggested we go exploring the city as well and snap some shots around there. She said Bryn might also be interested, so it should be a good time. I definitely didn’t get enough of exploring tonight. There’s so much of Halifax that I want to find and document.

Next weekend my roommates and I are hoping to have a bit of a get together here at the apartment. Anyone who would like to attend is welcome, as long as they are interested in doing some gaming, watching some movies, eating some food and having some good clean fun. Ringlos will be in abundance and so will quality folks.