I worked and then returned home. Ilea and I ordered some pizza, half donair for her and half Hawaiian for myself. When we went to pick up the pizza we stopped in at Leba’s store to rent a video. After browsing we finally found a film we both hadn’t seen, Signs.
I downloaded the new A Perfect Circle song from Thirteenth Step, “Weak and Powerless” during dinner today. It sounds similar to their previous work, but is definitely a step forward. I will definitely be picking up the new album the week it comes out, and I’ll be hoping I can see the band, with its new line up, in a live setting for this tour.
Now I’m watching Signs. So far it seems quite good…
Yes, that movie really was well done. It seemed to balance out its elements, though it was a bit predictable. It’s worth renting, for sure.

- 12:15 p.m. Tuesday – 7:15 p.m Wednesday

Ashley and I spent our last 24 hours together relaxed and wishing our time together would never end. Most of that time was spent enjoying each other’s company and preparing for her departure.

From the moment we awoke together until the time we said goodbye a the airport, I was filled with the conflicting feelings of my immense happiness and love while being with her, and my dread of when we would have to part. The morning seemed to go past like a strong wind, and I only wish it would turn back and return those precious moments to me. The touch of Ashley’s hand, the feel of her lips, the sweetness of her voice and all the other feelings that are echoing through my memories like moths trapped in my head. These gentle but persistant thoughts of the best days of my life will surely be with me always.

With our last kiss and the last time our eyes met time took up its too-slow crawl again. I walked to the book store where my parents were waiting for me with strides I was far too aware of, and the beginnings of an empty aching.

At the book store I spied some Dalai Lama books at the counter. I’ve always wanted to learn more about him, his religion and beliefs, so I decided to buy one of the books, The Dalai Lama’s Book Of Transformation. It is based upon his longer work, and best seller, Transforming the Mind. In the time between shopping and eating stops in Halifax I read this entire text. It’s a truly beautiful and inspiring read that lead me to a greater understanding of the Tibetan people’s encompassing philosophy, lo-jong (transforming the mind), and Buddhism in general. It also affirmed my own spiritual journey, to become a truly compassionate, and to put that love before all things.

I will certainly read more about this path when I can, and I will definitely re-read this book in the coming days.

The core of all wisdom and enlightenment is compassion / love. If you truly look at any spirital belief this is the message that has importance.

As long as space endures,
as long as sentient beings remain,
until then, may I too remain
and dispel the miseries of the world

I’m now home and typing through tears that heat my face in liquid lines. I miss Ashley very much now. Her scent still floats in this room and curls up among the blankets we shared. I wish for her hand upon my shoulder, to touch her long brown strands of hair, and to feel her comfort pressed against me.

I hope her flight went well and that she’s stepping off the plane and into the arms of her parents as I type this. As much as I always miss her, I have days of memory to hold onto and be blessed with, for they truly were days of wonder I could not wish to distill to words.

{36.}

[Music: Live - Like I Do]

- 11:00 a.m. Sunday – 12:15 p.m. Tuesday

On Sunday we visited the museum in Upper Stewiacke. It was rather cool to see all the old things and pieces of local history. The horse-drawn hearse was a highlight for me. It was really narrow and just looked awesome. I can almost picture it driving down the old dirt roads of Upper Stewiacke. Another interesting piece was the old telephone switch board. In the “phone book” (it was one piece of card board) there were barely 50 names, and all had only 2-digit phone numbers.

After that we went to Lemmon Hill and the Lemmon Hill Sports Association ball field to watch some of the Grampy Lemmon Softball Tournament. We saw Lucy, Larry, Gerry, Sharon and Hailey there. We went to the building for some onion rings and fries, and played with Hailey some before we had to leave.

After work on Monday we went to the Wild Life Park in Shubinacadie. Ashley really enjoyed her time there, as she hadn’t been to a zoo or the like since she was 8. We took planty of photos of all the animals, which included an arctic wolves, eagles, bears, caribou, deer, otters, beavers, porcupine, bobcats, hawks and countless other beautiful animals.

We then went to Farmer Clem’s in Stewiacke for some ice cream. Apple Dapple, which I chose, isn’t a great flavour but it was interesting. It tasted like apple pie filling.

In the time between all this, Ashley and I have been spending a lot of time together and making these last few hours together meaningful. Just 24 hours remain.

- 8:55 p.m. Friday – 11:00 a.m. Sunday

Our time together is now 2/3 over, and we’re certainly dreading the end of it while trying to do as much as possible in the time we have.

Yesterday we went for a walk outside and through the woods. It was nice to be in my favorite spot around this house with Ashley. It holds a lot of memories, and now some nice ones with her. The cutting of the trees will always be depressing, though. They are so beautiful, and their absence is nothing but ugly.

After dinner we went to the metropolis of Upper Stewiacke to pick Ilea up from work and to get some icecream. While at Bev’s Country Diner getting the ice cream we decided to rent a movie, Final Destination 2. It was quite good, though cheesy like every other horror movie I have ever seen.

The days are going by too quickly, but we’re holding on to these sacred moments together as long as we can.

[Music: Live - Heaven]

- 9:10 a.m Thursday – 8:55 p.m. Friday

It was another relaxing day with Ashley. We spent much of it just enjoying each other’s company.

After dinner we went for a bike ride and stopped in at Lucy’s for a while.

11:15 p.m. Wednesday – 9:10 a.m Thursday

I went to work in the morning Wednesday and did my usual duties. Around 12 my mother picked me up and we returned here.

My mother, Ilea, Ashley and I ate lunch and then went for a drive to Dollar Lake. It has been years (perhaps a decade) since the last time I was there. It brought back some childhood memories, for sure.

We swam for about an hour, with Ilea’s boyfriend, and my future roommate, Greg, showing up half way through our time there. It was very nice to be in the water with Ashley, and we all had a lot of fun.

Once we had dried off we went to the canteen. My mother got us all some fries and onion rings, and Ashley and I shared a Caramel Cowmotion ice cream cone. Before long we were on our way back here.

The rest of the night was uneventful, but certainly pleasant.

- 7:30 a.m. Wednesday – 11:15 p.m. Wednesday

I ended up deciding to skip work in favour of preparing some ebay packages and spending time with Ashley.

Our day was uneventful until around 1 we turned on the old tv in my room for a second and it started to smoke. Needless to say, that television is headed to the electronic graveyard soon.

Soon after that we went with my mother and sister to Truro. Truro is a small town with one mall, and a small one at that. Dispite the smallness we spent a couple hours in the mall and another hour at the Walmart(the most terrible of capitalist ventures). During this time Ashley bought a pair of sunglasses, Ilea got some dorm room goods and I made several purchases of my own. Live’s new album, Birds of Pray, a pair of brown sandals, some combat boots and 20 CD-R’s (for backing up various things and making CD’s for my friends) left with me by the end of the day.

We returned here and put things away. Ashley and I took a few photos, edited them and got them ready to be uploaded soon. We listened to music and now we’re both online for a little while until we’ll go to sleep.

- 7:30 a.m. Tuesday – 7:30 a.m. Wednesday

Once everyone was ready for the day, my parents, Ashley and I got in the car. We drove to the post office to pick up a Tori Amos poster I bought for Ashley a week ago.

I was dropped off at work while the others continued on to Middle Musquodoboit to pick up Ashley’s mom. I watered, weeded and did my usual work activities until they returned.

When they did return I was told Kathy was not able to get on her flight and would thus have to wait until 5 for the next one to Boston. My parents had wanted her to go with them and then return to the airport, but she insisted on waiting there and looking through the airport shops.

Ashley stayed with me at work when my parents left for home. She ended up sleeping on the swinging seat while I did my grounds keeping duties.

Back here we ate dinner, bathed, napped and generally relaxed for the remainder of the evening.

- 6:30 a.m. Monday – 7:30 a.m. Tuesday

I woke Ashley and everyone prepared for the day. I was sure to bring my cameras, and Ashley brought her own.

At 8:30 we left here and drove towards Middle Musquodoboit to pick up Kathy. As would happen all day, the time the 5 of us were in the car was filled with talking on countless topics.

The first stop was Peggy’s Cove. I had forgotten how beautiful it is. On the way there tons of big boulders dot the landscape, remnants of a glacier that receded thousands of years ago. It’s really an interesting sight to see those rocks perched on hills in the grassy land away from the coast.

The actual cove is amazing. There’s a lighthouse sitting on huge, very smooth rock cliffs, and the rocks are constantly licked by waves. We first stopped in the gift store so that I could buy a disposable camera and also we we could browse the goods. We walked along the shore, climbing over the rolling land and taking plenty of photos. The view there is so unique and beautiful, so natural, yet surreal. I’m sure we all could have happily spent hours walking around and hearing the crashing waves.

We returned to the gift shop and our mothers bought a few things. Ashley picked out a couple post cards that will be headed to pre-designated lucky LJers soon.

After the gift shop we stopped at a rock carved by a folk artist. It’s quite an impressive work. It has fishermen, an angel, a dorrey and other features carved with great detail.

We drove along more shore (allowing the Georgians to experience stereotypical Nova Scotian scenery) and then through Chester, where stopped at a couple places for supplies and nourishment. I was sure to buy 3 rolls of film and some Smarties to share with the guests (since they do not have them in the U.S.). Ashley and Kathy got Oh! Henry bites, another Canada-only chocolate snack.

More driving was done, including some stops at golf courses (my father is drawn to them) , before we went to dinner at a sea-side resturant for sea food. My mother had chicken stir-fry, but the rest of us had some fresh haddock (Ashley), scollaps (Kathy and I) and (for my father) a mixed chowder.

In Lunenburg (a UNESCO World Heritage site) we walked on the docks and were able to see the Blue Nose II, a replica Canada’s most famous sailing vessel (it is featured on our dimes). We all wandered around and took photos. There we also happened upon Miss Canada, who posed for photographs.

We also stopped beside Lunenburg Academy to see the huge old school house and the trees planted in honor of Canada’s provinces and territories. Ashley, my mother, and I all took the time to use the swings for a while.

The next stop was Mahone Bay. We saw the 3 famous churches there. They are all quite large and are along the shore, and stand right beside each other.

Most of the time here was spent looking through all the shops. Some of the notable stops included an ice cream break, gift shopping done by Kathy, and a secretive purchase of a mauve/blue Nova Scotia hat for Ashley.

When we left the final shop we headed for Halifax, our capital city. We hit the scenic spots, Point Pleasant Park, the water front and the Public Gardens in the dwindling light.

We ate dinner at Mexicali Rosa’s since Kathy loves Mexican food. The meal was really good.

We finished up there and turned our compass for the bed and breakfast. There I hugged and said goodbye to Ashley’s mother, since I will be working when she leaves for home around noon. She seemed very impressed with her day, and seemed to have liked my family (myself included) quite well.

20 minutes of further driving brought us back here. I discovered that my digital camera had lost all my photos, so that was saddening, but I hadn’t used it too much.

I gave Ashley the hat, which I knew she would love, we spent some time alone, bathed and went to sleep.

Now I’m awake and getting ready to go to work.

- 8:30 a.m. Sunday – 6:30 a.m. Monday

Yesterday morning I woke Ashley around 9. We prepared for the day while my mother drove to Middle Musquodoboit to pick up Kathy (it’s Kathy with a “K”, and not with a “C” as I had mistakenly typed throughout my entry yesterday).

Kathy and my mother arrived, so after some time talking we returned to Lucy’s for the end of the reunion. We ate more of the usual fare, including hot dogs and squares. We talked and took photos for a while and then Ashley and I decided to go for a walk.

We went down the main road past Gerry and Sharron’s to the old logging road that I enjoy biking down quite often. It definitely takes a lot longer on foot than on wheels. After a good walk down the dirt road, we turned right into the trees and down the cliff leading to the brook. We traversed it with not too much difficulty and reached the bottom and the water. There we took some photos of the forest and of each other. It really is quite a beautiful spot. Eventually we climbed the cliff back to the road, making our way through bushes, over and under trees and their limbs.

When we returned to Lucy’s, my mother and Kathy had already sped off without us. Lucy let us use the phone to call home, so we didn’t have to make another half hour walk.

The rest of the day was peaceful, and consisted of pieces of time spent talking with Kathy and my mother, spending time alone with Ashley, listening to some of the CD’s Ashley brought along, and eating dinner. During this time we made plans for Tuesday, when we intend to show our Georgian guests some of the sights of Nova Scotia, especially along the coast near Peggy’s Cove and Mahone Bay (the handy tourist traps).

Now I’m up nice and early (so I can write these longish entries I need to break my sleep before Ashley, since I want to spend all our waking time together while we can) and about ready to get some breakfast and shower.